The Evil Eye

I just got off the phone with my sister, who is not sure she wants to come to my baby shower. She says she is superstitious, but I really don't undersand why. I've never been much for superstition, although I do read my horoscope sometimes. Anyway, I never even knew Jewish women didn't have baby showers until 2 years ago when my friend Nitza was pregnant. I was like, oh, let's make her a baby shower, and everyone was like, no, you can't because of the evil eye.

The evil eye is very annoying and inconvenient, if you ask me. When my mother was born, my grandparents kept her in a drawer. A drawer - I swear to god! When I was a kid, I always thought they meant that they pulled out a drawer, stuck her in it, and then closed it back up, still full of socks and everything. I guess they must have kept it on the ground by their bed and had it lined with blankets and stuff. Actually, it probably made quite a cozy little bassinett, but that's not why they did it -- they did it out of fear.

Historically, when mothers and babies survived childbirth far less often than they do today, I suppose it made sense. After all, how terrible to have to return all those gifts and furniture and everything. But I was always taught to prepare well ahead of time for new situations and this seems like a situation you'd want to be really prepared for. You don't want to be out shopping for a crib 3 days after giving birth, when you're sleep-deprived and just learning how to breastfeed and stuff - right?

But the thing I was trying to explain to my sister is I don't want the baby shower for all the presents -- as my mother pointed out, people are going to give us plenty of stuff no matter what. And whatever we don't get, we'll just buy on Craigslist (much to my grandmother's horror). For me, the party is right of passage, a welcoming into this stage of womanhood. My sister pointed out that some Jewish people have parties after they give birth with men and women and the baby there -- but that's really a party for the baby, not the mom. This is really about femaleness and fertility. I don't know if it's corny or too anthropological to describe it this way, but I would be so sad not to have this little celebration. I am completely grateful to Larry's sisters for organizing it for me. It also really means a lot that my mom is going to come - even if she's not going to bring a present (actually, she already sent me a stroller/car seat, which I promised to keep in the basement until the actual arrival). Anyway, it means a lot to me, even if it's cheesy, so I hope she'll change her mind and come, because that would be really sweet and it would be so nice to have her there.